Bri Blahg… 9/2 Music News Round Up: Charlie Watts Quits Eminem’s Small Penis Or Why Punctuation Is Important

2 09 2009

by Brian Phillips (@BrianBlahg)

Watts Leaves Stones Under Own Power

Can you have The Rolling Stones without Charlie Watts? Spin reports that after 47 years Watts is walking away from the kit. According to the magazine’s website Charlie Drayton from Keith’s solo band The X-Pensive Winos will replace. Drayton’s a good drummer, but perhaps it’s time for The Stones to hang ’em up. I’m sure the band has an excellent pension.

Cripes The Stones were something though weren’t they?

DJ AM Death May Have Been Suicide

Spin has an update on the death of DJ AM. It’s pretty brutal.

Albarn Rings Horrors For New Gorillaz

I’m a huge Damon Albarn guy so I’ll trust he knows what he’s doing in collaborating with The Horrors on a new Gorillaz project.

This new Horrors song isn’t bad I suppose:

Marr Mind F*%#s Smiths Fans

Johnny Marr says he’s too busy for a Smith’s reunion. That’s it Johnny, string the pale boys in sweaters along just enough. Never gonna happen people. Truth be told Marr is actually very busy. First he joins Modest Mouse and then The Cribs. Money quote: “I can’t bear the thought of a Spandau Ballet style comeback. What’s the point? Spandau are reforming, so they put on a big chicken-in-the-basket event, which is all they amounted to in the first place.” Ouch.

I don’t know what a “chicken-in-the-basket event” is, but it can’t be good:

Neil Young Concerned He Hasn’t Gotten My Money For Awhile

Rolling Stone says the next release from Neil Young’s endless archives comes from his 1992 “Harvest Moon” solo tour. I saw one of the first ’92 shows on at The Paramount in Seattle (where Young did a seven night sold out stand). Highlight? “After The Goldrush” on his old pump organ. Stunning….

I couldn’t find that footage, but this will do nicely:

Pearl Jam Answers Heat On Target Deal

Pearl Jam says the deal they made with Target for their new album “Backspacer” passed their moral muster. I’m not going to lose any sleep over it myself.

Ryan Adams Forgets He’s Married To Mandy Moore, Makes Hundreds Of Paintings Instead

Seriously bands that take five years to make a stinking record need to take a lesson from Ryan Adams. He not only pumps out thousands of songs a year, he’s now a painter too. A New York Gallery is showing his work for charity. Adams is so resourceful that Courtney Love believes he made an entire album using only her credit cards. Bonus: Buy me a beer sometime and I’ll tell you about a guy I sorta know who used to road manage Ryan Adams. He was a handful.

Speaking Of Courtney Love’s Bank Account

We have an update on the Guitar Hero 5 Kurt Kobain avatar. I can’t even say it, just watch:

Hey I know it’s my fault. Nirvana’s music actually meant something to me.

Ooo That Smell

I dig No Age, so I’ll probably dig this too.

Malaysian Government Lifts Ban, Shows Ankle

No reason given, but the Malaysian government has reversed its ban on Muslims attending a Black Eyed Peas show sponsored by Guinness Stout. I’m still trying to figure out why Guinness is blowing large marketing dollars backing a Black Eyed Peas show anywhere let alone Malaysia. Hip hop-a-pop fans in predominatly Islamic countries ain’t your target demo right? What do I know….

It’s interesting how the law is applied in Malaysia. As I understand it Islamic Sharia is enforced by the government, but only on Muslims. Everyone else adheres to a differing set of “civil laws.” I think just to be on the safe side, Fergie should wear a burka.

Regardless countries like Malaysia always get shitty shows. It’s not like AC/DC is coming to town. For our readers in Kuala Lumpur:

Also Not Invited To Malaysia

This guy has made an album using only pig sounds. Good for him. Figures Pitchfork has the story. Now they can trick you into liking it instead of Wavves.

Timbaland Will Teach You, But He’ll Have To Charge

The makers of Grand Theft Auto have teamed with Timbaland for a video game that purports to teach you about music making, not just music mimicking ala Rock Band or Guitar Hero.

So Timbaland, creator of his own bland brand of one-cheek-sneak-a-phonic is going is to show us how to make music. This is the man behind Chris Cornell’s abominable “Scream” album. ‘Nuff said. Bonus points: Timbaland now refers to himself in the third person. Only Ricky Henderson should do that.

Madonna Digests Lima Bean, Collapses

How did we miss this?

Eating: Try It Today, You’ll Love It!

Save The Wise Crack, Whitney’s Back

Whitney Houston says she never left. Well yes, compared to Bobby Brown I suppose you didn’t. UPDATE: Whitney blames Oprah for lousy performance.

Eminem’s Doesn’t Cast Much Of A Shady

Eminem’s ex wife says he has a small penis. You never hear celebrity wives say their ex is huge do you. Just something to ponder.

Oh Shit

Girl Talk is doing another New York show. Girl Talk gigs are turning into this generation’s Jimmy Buffet concert. “I must wear stupid hat. I must act like asshole.”



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: