Bri Blahg… I’m Sick Today, Might As Well Listen To Chris Cornell’s “Scream”

13 03 2009

by Brian Phillips (@BrianBlahg)

Man I feel like shit again today. I’ve had this crud off and on for several weeks now. Mostly I just feel run down and my head goopy. Rather than ruin a great day with Chris Cornell’s new album “Scream,” I’ll just listen to it now.

I have a grudging admiration for this project because an idea this monstrously wrong could only be advanced by sheer force of will. Teaming the ex-Soundgarden front man with Timbaland was such a horrid plan that surely the record would never see the light of day. Well here it is. It’s pretty obvious Cornell didn’t care one whiff what anyone thought. “Scream” would be made, and it would be released.

Timbaland I suppose did exactly what he was paid to do; create wafer thin layers of tinny computer speaker backing tracks over which Cornell could repeat dully insipid lyrics. Instead of his trademark plaster crackling wail we’re left with what sounds like an aging R&B diva trying to squeeze out one more hit. Dione Warwick would have turned up her nose at this bloodless plinky dinky twaddle. Look, we know from Timbaland’s resume that the man hates music, but what excuse does Cornell have? None. Seriously, at this point I will only accept insanity. And what of this travesty being released at all. Someone green lighted this piece of grunt. Whoever it was should be fired, and thrown through a window.

Meanwhile both are holding to the party line. Timbaland calls it “the best work of my career,” and said Cornell would be “the first rocker in the club.” Cornell boasted that “Scream” was a “highlight of my career.” Maybe he has gone insane.




2 responses

27 08 2009
Bri Blahg… Music News Round Up: Thursday August 27, 2009 « Palestra Music Blog

[…] Virgin Atlantic Fights can pass the time listening to Chris Cornell’s disastrous album “Scream” The album had a profound affect on this […]

2 09 2009
Bri Blahg… 9/2 Music News Round Up: Charlie Watts Quits Eminem’s Small Penis Or Why Punctuation Is Important « Palestra Music Blog

[…] is going to show us how to make music. This is the man behind Chris Cornell’s abomidable “Scream” album. ‘Nuff said. Bonus points: Timbaland now refers to himself in the third person. Only […]

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